There’s a psychology to pain.
I don’t mean physical pain right now, but emotional pain.
The kind that jerks your heart and makes you wonder if you’ll see the next day. The kind that threatens the very breath in your lungs.
I can’t quite explain it, but emotional pain sometimes cuts so deeply, and because it’s not physical, it can be easily ignored. But sitting with it and going through your own journey of healing, no matter the noise around you, no matter the comments from people or the doubts that poke at your mind, that healing is the greatest gift you can give yourself. Truth is, healing doesn’t change what happened. But it transforms you.
You grow.
You begin to see and give new meaning to your hurt. But most importantly, you learn. And you grow. Because what is healing if you don’t also confront your own hypocrisy and shortcomings?
When you hope for something, an opportunity, maybe? and everything crumbles right in your hands, it hurts.
And I really don’t like people who won’t let you mourn. They are always quick to say ‘move on’. It annoys me. They annoy me.
I don’t like people who pretend nothing gets to them, because deep down, it does. Maybe that’s why they are the way they are. They’re living on a constant anesthetic, unable to feel pain, numb to the emotions of this world. But here’s the sad part: if you’re numb to pain, you’re also numb to joy. You don’t get to pick and choose how numbness works. I know not all hurt is the same. And more than people like to admit, only those who carry the hurt know how deep the cut truly went.
Bottom line?
The peace we crave often hides in chaos. Just like growth demands discomfort, the version of ourselves we’re chasing shows up in the storm. Not outside it.
Now, when I look back at opportunities I lost, I see things differently. From this new place of clarity, with a little more wisdom and a little less emotion. I see my own blind spots. And I get why some doors didn’t open.
So when the emotions quiet down, and the hurt becomes memory, ask yourself: With what I now know, was it really unfair? Did I truly play no part in it?
And I hope, truly hope, you answer honestly.
Like I always say to my people:
The worst form of deceit is self-deceit.
And it’s cancerous.
So here’s to healing.
To breathing.
To living.
Love Always Abby 💛
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